When you think of a gift, the image that comes to mind may be a beautifully wrapped package, complete with a bow on top. The word celebration brings to mind laughter, music, maybe even champagne. These are all well and good, but it’s not what I wanted.

I had already celebrated my birthday throughout the month. I’d spent time with a group of dear friends, walked through a field of sunflowers with my dreamy boyfriend, and enjoyed the outdoor musical swings at the North Carolina Art Museum. But for my actual birthday I wanted something else.

“I do not want a large celebration filled with noise. I want to give my soul plenty of room to mark the moment.”

-Beth Brower

What I wanted and needed was a day without time, a day where I never had to know what time it was. I enjoyed waking without an alarm, followed by a leisurely breakfast and reading in the garden. The morning was pleasantly cool for a long walk. With no set route in mind I wandered through neighborhoods, connecting from one greenway to another. As people passed by with their arms pumping and conversations flowing, I enjoyed a slower pace.

My pace was slow enough to pray gratitude, slow enough to notice a turtle posing next to the path and a butterfly further along. I used my phone to take pictures, leaving it on silent mode so it wouldn’t interrupt my flow of prayers. In this day without time I also needed silence and solitude.

I stopped at a park to sit at a picnic table, elevating my weary legs on the bench while enjoying a snack. Gazing at the grassy field, I considered the possibility of having a future yoga class there. We’d enjoy the feel of sun on our skin, birdsong for music, friends picnicking together afterwards.

After hours of meandering, I made my way home for lunch in the garden, a shower and a long nap. I read good books until I was hungry enough to stop and make dinner then read some more. There was journaling and meditation before bed. My legs were tired, my feet sore, my heart filled with gratitude, and my soul was nourished. The day was such a gift to myself, a celebration of 57 years, with happy anticipation for the years to come.